Originally posted on 12/31/2019 (reformatted).

A sense of setting ourselves apart from our peers is instilled in law school. Make good grades. Join a legal society. Win book awards. Intern at prestigious firm or high court. Work as a summer associate. Get a scholarship. Become editor-in-chief of law review.  And, in doing so, we often compete against our classmates and other applicants. We train ourselves to be the best we can professionally be so that we stand out and obtain the privilege of opportunities we otherwise would not have.

Don’t believe me? Take a look at any law firm’s listing of attorneys. Chances are accolades are listed by the bio of an attorney highlighting his or her accomplishments. Additionally, a sense of honor or prestige can be associated with those highlighted opportunities. The attorney stands out in a positive way.  And, as newer/younger attorneys, we are often expected to seize these moments as they are privileges in our profession and may be few and far between. 

That being said, a sense of being “too involved” can be counterproductive. What do I mean by “too involved”? Put simply, being too involved is when professional obligations can overrun your life leaving you with no personal life and the feeling of being stressed all the time. Some of us experience this already even with no extra-curricular involvement as our jobs become all consuming. 

More recently, perhaps more than ever, work-life balance is discussed and analyzed in the legal profession. Some of the information is aspirational, while other components are completely attainable. We decide individually what it means to us. However, one aspect that is not often addressed is our own self-inducing stress and how to be okay with scaling back. 

As attorneys, we often overextend ourselves for the practice, our clients, and seemingly impossible deadlines. Toss family commitments, other professional obligations, and self-care into the mix, and we can understand how self-care is low in priorities for us. So as new or young attorneys, how can we seek more balance in our lives from the outset of our careers?

In addition to the many helpful practices and tips from eating healthy, exercising, and “unplugging” from technology, let’s start practicing saying no. Some of us have absolutely no qualms with turning down opportunities and utilizing the two-letter word. Others struggle with it. Regardless of where we individually gauge our comfort level with this concept, we all face trade-offs in our busy field.

Therefore, I believe we can all stand to examine ourselves with respect to the commitments we take on. How do we spend our time? Do we consider it time well spent or wisely spent? Are we often overwhelmed or feel (more often than not) we do not have time for everything? What is the professional time commitment versus personal life ratio? The questions can continue.

One of the ways we can work toward better balance is making sure our priorities and commitments make sense. Rather than accepting every positive opportunity or feel the need to always stand out above the crowd, maybe we can take the time to check in with the individuals we were and still are prior to joining the profession. Let’s make sure we don’t forget our friends from our “past lives,” hobbies we enjoyed, and our families that worked hard to support us achieving our dreams. Most importantly, let’s not forget about staying true to ourselves.

And, of course, these concepts may sound more aspirational (or dare I say cheesy?) rather than pragmatic. However, by giving our commitments thought and by being comfortable with saying no from time to time to some of the opportunities that come our way, we can possibly reduce some self-induced stress and create more time for our entire self and not just who we are in the legal community.

(Author unknown).